Recently I posted about being unhappy because I didn't give some folks who were collecting money for victims of the Haitian and Pakistani natural disasters the time of day. At the time I was absorbed in the business of getting dinner going and annoyed with the constant requests we seem to receive.
Later that week someone I know had an annoyed post on Facebook about the Angel Tree at their church, where a teen had requested a real pair of Ugg boots.
My friend, a young Mom who doesn't work was peeved that the girl would ask for such an extravagant item.
As the former Mom of teenagers I had some sympathy for the gift-requesting teen. Kids see stuff, they want it. There wasn't any reason to criticize the teen for saying what she wanted. I'd like some of those boots too!
It got me to thinking about my own giving behavior. I got myself to the YMCA and picked out gifts to give early, so I could pick gifts that fell within my comfort range -- thus avoiding the problem of my friend who was confronted with a request that was outside of what she was willing or able to spend on a gift for someone she didn't even know. I'm not annoyed over the gift requests I got because I manipulated the experience to fall within my comfort zone.
I think I need to stretch. When I only give within my comfort zone I'm not testing my faith in the power of God to provide. I'm acting like I'm responsible for all the plenty in my life and like I can hold onto my abundance of my own will. I am old enough to know that's not true. The good things in life that I enjoy have very little to do with my own virtue or worthiness. They're gifts to me from God, and when I give them away I'm testifying as to my belief in his generosity. I need to strive for some therapeutic discomfort in my own giving, and quit worrying about what everybody else thinks.
